The way I used to live

chapter 30

Daksha's POV:

The next morning, I freshened up and went downstairs. As the wedding day is getting closer, everyone

is busy with their chores.

My mom is busily applying the turmeric paste to the wedding invitations. Dad is talking to the caterers

over the phone.

Even Aaru, Yuktha, and Rishu are busy discussing something. Yuktha and Rishu are sitting on either

side of Aarna on the couch while Aarna has a notepad on her lap and a pen in her hand.

I noticed that she was doing only one thing i.e., writing something and striking it off again and again.

Just like me, both Yuktha and Rishu must have been fed up with her behavior. That was why both of

them smacked the back of her head together.

After that, they looked at each other and started laughing like idiots because of their mirrored actions.

At least Rishu had the decency to snigger by covering her mouth but Yuktha was laughing directly at

Aarna's face.

When I saw that Aarna was ready to retort back at them, I interrupted them, not wanting for World War

III to start in the morning itself.

When they saw me, both stopped laughing. Aarna bit back her retort and sat there while sulking.

"What are guys busy with?" I asked them.

After hearing my question, Aarna scoffed and turned her face to another side with a pout on her face.

It was her indirect way of letting me know that she did not want to talk to me. I smiled at her childish

behavior.

"We are not," Yuktha laughed, "Only Aaru is busy with an important thing. She is having a hard time

making a list of the delicacies that she wants to eat at your wedding." After saying this, Yuktha involved

herself in another laughing fit.

"Really?" I took the notepad from Aarna's lap.

I started laughing after seeing the contents in that book too. She prepared a schedule for her eating

session for every half an hour.

When I reached the dessert section, I saw that she first wrote ice cream, then she removed it by

striking it off and wrote Gulab Jamun instead and again struck it off. Finally, she wrote the names of the

pastries there and received a smack from Yuktha and Rishu before she could get a chance to strike

them off too.

"Looks like you are really having a hard time, Aaru baby," I teased her while laughing.

She stood up from the couch and snatched the notepad from me. After glaring at me, she went towards

my Mom and rested her head on her shoulders while puffing her cheeks.

Mom was smiling at our banter. I took Aarna's place and settled myself between Yuktha and Rishu.

Meanwhile, Dad finished his call and motioned us to explain what happened there.

"Uncle, I will tell you. What will they do except for teasing me? They are teasing me because I am

preparing a schedule regarding what to eat at her wedding. It's not like Daksha is going to get married

every day, right? That's why I prepared it. Now they are laughing at me," she complained to my Dad

and he listened to everything with a small smile playing on his lips.

"Especially that Yuktha Akka. Instead of laughing at others’ expense, she should think about her own

marriage. She is getting older. I lost my hope for her marriage as no one will be willing to marry an old

lady. So, I want to have everything to the fullest at Daksha Akka's marriage. Uncle, is it wrong?" she

asked him and waited for his response.

"Yeah, I agree with you,” he laughed. “Young ladies, why are you teasing her?" he asked us and

pretended to glare at us. After that, he again turned his face to look at Aarna.

"What you have said is right. Yuktha is becoming too old and she is not getting any matches. So, why

don't you get married after your Daksha Akka's marriage? You can also get a chance to eat the

wedding delicacies again," he asked her.

When he was saying the first part, she kept on nodding her head, agreeing with him. But when she

heard the last sentence which was directed at her, she stopped nodding at him and looked at my Dad

wide-eyed.

"That..Uncle.I think I heard my phone ring. I am going to my room." After saying this, she sprinted

upstairs like some mad dogs were chasing her.

We all started laughing at her behavior. God! How much I was going to miss this fun! I sighed sadly in

my mind. I got distracted by my Mom.

"Daksha, your dad and I are going to the temple to place the first wedding card at the feet of the deity.

From the temple, we will go to your in-law's house to give them the card. We have to distribute the

cards to our family friends and close relatives too. So, you guys have your food on time, and Daksha,

don't forget to have your breakfast. We will get going then. Take care." She left after listing so many

dos and don'ts.

Yuktha and Rishu went to their rooms. After having my breakfast, I went to the lawn and sat on the

swing for a while.

Remembering something, I hurriedly reached the room which was prohibited for outsiders. I opened the

door with my shaky hands.

Once I entered that room, so many memories played in front of my eyes. My heart constricted at the

sudden surge of emotions. I slowly reached the closet and took a carton box that had my name on it.

I opened it after cutting the tape that was plastered on it. I took out the dresses and sarees that were

placed in them.

I held a saree with my hands and caressed it lightly as I drifted back into memory lane.

•Flashback•

"Teju, why are you staying up so late when you don't even have any orders in your hands currently?" I

asked her.

"I am designing a saree for a client. She is important to me. So, I want to put in some extra effort into

the design of her saree," she replied to me.

"Can I know who is this so-called important client?" I asked her while scoffing.

"If you want to know about my client, I can give you some clues, " she laughed. "She is my very first

client. She is the one who offered me a good life and even a family too. She looks so beautiful. You can Content (C) Nôv/elDra/ma.Org.

say it like this, she is my life and I can even sacrifice it for her," she said these words while looking into

my eyes. I immediately engulfed her in a bone-crushing hug.

"Never say that, okay? How can I live without you? You are my life too. I am so lucky that I got to meet

you on that day," I said to her with tears in my eyes and she agreed to it after saying a 'Sorry'.

"By the way, what's the need for designing it now when we don't even have any occasion shortly?" I

asked her after a while.

"Silly girl, " she chortled. " It is for a future occasion only. I am designing a saree for your wedding. Who

knows what the future holds for us! So, I want you to wear a saree that I made with my own hands,"

she said to me.

"Girl, you are talking like you won't be there for my wedding." After saying this, I gave a light smack on

her arm.

"It's not like that. How can I leave you? I am preparing the saree because currently I am pretty free and

I want to utilize this time by investing it fully in your wedding saree because for your wedding, I will be

busy with all the preparations and I won’t be able to concentrate on it fully. I even made some designs

for Aaru, Yuktha, and Rishu. Yours is the last one as I want to concentrate more on it." After saying this,

she again immersed herself in the work. I shook my head at her worries for the future.

•End of the flashback•

Back then, the naive me didn't take her words to heart but who knew that her words would become

true. Who knew she wouldn't be with me on the most important day of my life?

She left us. She broke her promise and left me alone. All I was left with were her memories. I could

give anything to get her back. Alas! Not everything happens according to our wishes

I hugged that saree tightly to my chest with the continuous flow of tears from my eyes. I was suddenly

engulfed in a group hug.

I looked up, to see the three of them hugging me. I didn’t realize when they came to the room, but they

were what I needed the most at the moment. I hugged them back and cried my heart out.

"Guys, she left us. How I wished that I didn't meet her that day! How I wished she hadn’t been a part of

our lives! If only I didn't meet her that day and if only I didn't bring her into my life, she might be alive

somewhere, living her life happily. I am the culprit behind her death. Who will punish me? Do I deserve

this life? See, here I am, getting married as if nothing has happened. I don't have a right to be happy

after snatching it from others." After saying this, I started sobbing uncontrollably.

"Calm down, Daksha. Her death was nowhere your fault. Just imagine to what extent she must have

loved you that she even ignored her own life while saving yours. Do you think she will be happy after

seeing you living like this? She always wanted you to be happy. I am sure you would have done the

same had you been in her place," Yuktha consoled me and they again hugged me.

"Akka, until now, you have punished yourself for the crime that you didn't commit. You even punished

Aunty and Uncle in the process of punishing yourself. You felt that living away from them might make

you feel less guilty. But have you ever thought of their side? Have you ever thought about how they

would live without you in their life?" Rishu asked me by placing a hand over my shoulder and

continued.

"I don't know whether you noticed it or not. Your marriage brought so much happiness to them and we

got to see the smiles on their faces after a long time. You returned to your cheery self and this house

got its previous glory back. If this marriage brought so many positive changes in you and your

surroundings, how can you say that you don't deserve this marriage and this life?" She asked me. This

was the first time I saw her like that but what she said made so much sense.

"Yeah, Akka. I agree with them. This marriage is a blessing in our lives. I have positive feelings about

this marriage from the start. Akka, you should try to move on from your past. I am not asking you to

forget it but don't let it influence your present. You got an understanding person as your partner. Trust

him and trust yourself. He won't leave you in your struggles. He won't even let them come in your way.

So, please never think like that. You deserve this whole world. This marriage is just a beginning," Aarna

said after releasing herself from the hug.

"You know, I am so lucky that I got you guys as my friends. I will never talk like that again. I am sure

Arjun will understand my past and support me in facing it. I love you all. Even though we miss her a lot,

we should remember her with a smile on our faces. I will give my best to make this marriage work," I

told them with a smile after wiping off my tears and hugged each other.

"By the way, Teju even prepared the dresses for you guys. They are in that closet. Try them out when

you are free. At my wedding, I am going to wear the sarees and dresses that she had designed. I want

to feel her presence by wearing them. Hope you guys won't have a problem with wearing them too?" I

asked them and they agreed to it instantly.

"Oh, shit! In a hurry to see what happened to you, I left the ice cream that I was eating in my room

itself. It must be molten by now," she said and slapped her forehead while making a sad pouted.

"This girl and her worries are out of this world," Yuktha said and we all shared a hearty laugh.