Indebted to the Mafia King

Chloe

"What do you mean?" he asks with a frown. "You can't do what anymore?"

"I can't do this push and pull anymore. I...." I choke on my words, feeling uncomfortable all of a sudden.

So, with pain in my chest, I get up from his lap and start gathering my clothes from the floor and putting them back on. I feel his eyes on me the entire time, but he doesn't say anything. He probably realizes there is no way we can escape this conversation anymore.

Tony silently picks his boxers and pants up from the floor and puts them on, and for a whole minute, we're both mute, neither of us daring to continue the conversation. Once we're dressed, I look at him, finding him staring at me from the same spot on the couch.

"I am tired of not knowing what this is," I finally clarify, gesturing between us. When Tony doesn't answer, I add, "Maybe you shouldn't have come here after all."

I don't mean it, but I'm mad at him for always being quiet when I need him to say something, anything at all, to ease my mind and heart.

It's frustrating not knowing what to expect from him, from us, from our fake relationship that doesn't look so fake anymore.

"What is it that you want from me, Chloe?" he finally asks, sounding tired.

And that's what makes me snap at him. How come he can't see what I want?

"Isn't it obvious?" I yell, disappointed.

He sighs, propping his elbows on his knees and holding his head in his hands. "Chloe, you know we can't do this.... I can't do this. I can't give you the life you deserve. You'll have a target on your back for the rest of your entire life," Tony tells

me.

I sneer, frustrated. "Are you kidding me right now? Come on, Tony. You can come up with a better excuse than this. I'm already your wife. And, in case you've forgotten, I was born into this life," I counter bitterly. "I'm the daughter of a fucking Capo! The fact that you think that will change because of you is ridiculous. That's nothing about this life that is new to me. Except maybe my feelings for you," I confess, my voice lowering slightly at the end of the sentence. My eyes meet his again, and with courage I can't locate the source of, I take a deep breath and lay out my heart to him-something I promised myself I wouldn't do.

"I love you, Tony," I say softly, holding his gaze. "I think I might always have loved you."

He stares at me, completely dumbstruck, as if I just hit him with a car or something. I know I caught him off guard, but the fact that he's not saying anything, or at least slightly happy that I shared my feelings, breaks my heart.

A scoff escapes my lips when I realize he's really not going to say anything. "Great. I never took you for a coward, but I guess there's always room for disappointment in life."novelbin

Without waiting another second, I turn on my heel and head down the hallway toward the office. It's a room neither my mom or I ever use, but right now, I just need a moment to myself.

I close the door behind me and lock it, sliding down against the wood and sitting on the floor like a little girl who has just been sent to her room. I wrap my arms around my legs, pulling them tight against my chest and sinking my head onto my knees.

I can't face Tony right now. I feel rejected, ignored, and disappointed, not to mention heartbroken. I was always aware that my marriage to him was fake, that I shouldn't nourish feelings for him. This was my mistake. This is on me.

However, it's not like I can control my heart or my feelings. It's not like I can tell myself not to love someone. Because, if that was possible, I would have done it in a heartbeat. Because I've always known Tony has this barrier against feelings and emotions. He is scared of getting involved, of being vulnerable. Anyone who looks at him-really looks-can see that.

And I don't blame him for it. The life we lead-the life he leads-it's not easy. It takes great courage to let someone else in. And I understand the fear he has to get me more involved, to put Ellie in danger....

But, like I said, it's not because of him that our lives are at risk. I was born into this. And to make things worse, I got involved with Mateo. Even if Tony wasn't here, I would still be in trouble. Right now, if anything, he is my guardian angel. He is the only person I can count on to take care of me and Ellie.

Why can't he see that?

Memories of moments we shared together invade my mind, and for a moment, I allow myself to relish them, to relive them.

I don't know how long it's been when a soft knock on the door pulls me out of my reverie.

"Chloe?" Tony calls from the other side, his voice muffled by the thick wood. There is a pause where I imagine he might be taking a deep breath and thinking about what to say, and I simply wait, not giving him any sign that I am listening. I also don't trust my voice right now, not with tears welling up in my eyes.

"Listen, I am leaving for Miami tomorrow." He pauses again, giving me a second to take in what he's saying.

He's going after Mateo after all.

Otherwise, why would he be going to Miami? I don't know what to do with this information. My heart feels so small right now, and I can barely breathe, the possible outcomes of his trip to Miami invading my brain for a moment. "I'm really sorry," Tony adds. Then I hear his footsteps fading away.

The front door slams. He's gone. I finally let out a sob. In fact, it's like I opened a dam, the tears I've been holding back rolling down my cheeks nonstop.

It takes me a long time to compose myself, but I force myself to be strong. I can't appear to be upset when my mother returns home with Ellie. She might be here any second now that Tony has left.

I pull myself from the floor and head upstairs to take a shower. I still have Tony's scent all over me, and even though it pains me to wash it away, it hurts even more to smell him and not be able to be near him.

The hot water makes me feel slightly better, but I don't take as long as I'd like in the shower. I get out and dry off after his scent has faded down the drain.

Pulling a robe from the wall hook, the mirror still fogged up by the steam, I walk out of the bathroom just in time to hear the alarm go off again.

In my heart, there's a small seed of hope that it might be Tony coming back. The alarm is shut off almost immediately, and I remember how he struggled with the alarm the first time he came in.

I come to a halt, immediately frowning.

Maybe it's Mom, I think, but I immediately shove the thought away. I don't think she'd make this mistake with the alarm after living here for a while now.

Slowly, I head out of the bedroom and down the stairs, fastening the robe belt around me and tightening it in a knot. My heart beats fast at the prospect of seeing Tony again. Maybe he regretted not giving me an answer. Maybe he gave it a second thought and considered the idea of us being together. Maybe I proved my point after telling him there was nothing in this life I'm not already used to.

But when I get to the foyer, I see the one person I hoped I'd never have to see again.

Mateo stands by the door, holding a gun in his hand, a stupid grin plastered across his face. I feel a cold shiver run up my spine, and I have to force my knees to stay steady so they don't buckle under me.

"Hello, love," he greets me in a cold, dark voice, taking a step forward, toward me. "I guess you have some explaining to do."

Then, with a swift movement, he points the gun at the camera in the corner of the ceiling and shoots it. The bang of the gun deafens me for a moment.

He's coming at me now, his steps slow and precise, almost like a wolf hunting, ambushing its prey. My back hits the wood handrail of the stairs, and I realize I am cornered. This is it....

The moment I've been postponing ever since my dad died.

All those nightmares are finally coming true-and there's absolutely nothing in the world I can do about it.